setling fiercely

I’ve spent the better part of the last two months back in the United States bouncing between various worlds, helping family and tracking down friends, scheduling visits and hiking in places my feet have missed in the last two years.
It’s beautiful and bizarre, inspiring and occasionally confusing to cram so much in, but tiring. I lack a home to rest and recuperate in, my own space in which to spread out my thoughts, to leave some resting safely while I tackle others or explore a tangent. No matter how much I might appreciate the various homes I stay in, couches I crash on, or offered beds, they are not mine… I need to take ownership of a space, to call it my own, for my mind to wind down and breathe easy.
Tonight, sitting in a favorite old coffee shop in Duluth, I am tired. Satisfied by the last few days, definitely, but tired and in need of rest. I’ve some temporary respites coming up, some brief stops that will help keep my head healthy while wanderlust still courses in my veins. I am certainly not done with wandering and traveling. I’m just starting to think that when I am ready to settle, when I am ready to remain in one place for several years or more, it will be due to a weariness with wanderlust, with a fierce craving for something consistent and solid that speaks with a louder voice. When I plunk down for a long spell, I’ll be doing so with as much fire as my wandering soul carries now.

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